Creating a Parenting Plan in Ontario

What a Parenting Plan Generally Is

If you're separating or divorcing and have children, you've probably come across the term "parenting plan" already — in a pamphlet, on a legal website, or from a friend who's been through it. At its core, a parenting plan is generally just a written document that describes how two parents intend to raise their child or children after they've stopped living together. It isn't a single fixed form, and there's no one right way to write one. Instead, it's a practical, flexible tool that parents use to turn a lot of the day-to-day questions of co-parenting — where the child sleeps on a Tuesday, who signs the school forms, how a disagreement about bedtime gets resolved — into something both parents can point back to later.

Because the phrase can mean slightly different things in different contexts, it helps to think of a parenting plan less as a legal category and more as a container. It generally holds the practical detail behind two broader legal ideas: parenting time (when a child is in each parent's care) and decision-making responsibility (who has authority over major decisions like schooling, health care, and religious upbringing). A parenting plan takes those ideas and makes them specific to one family — for example, spelling out that the children switch homes every Sunday evening, or that both parents will discuss a change of school together before either commits to it.

This page is meant as a plain-language starting point — a general answer to "what actually is one of these things, and do I need one?" For a deeper, more detailed reference on how to build a parenting plan section by section, see our companion guide to parenting plans in Ontario, and if you'd like a guided way to start drafting your own, our Parenting-Plan Builder walks through common topics one at a time.

Do You Actually Need One?

Generally speaking, no — Ontario law does not require separated or divorcing parents to have a written parenting plan. Plenty of families manage the transition with nothing more formal than an ongoing conversation, a shared calendar, and a general understanding of how things will work. If you and your co-parent are communicating well and things are running smoothly without anything written down, there's no legal obligation pushing you to change that.

That said, "not required" isn't the same as "not useful," and most parents find that putting something in writing pays off well before anything goes wrong. A written plan tends to reduce the kind of low-grade friction that comes from two people quietly remembering a conversation differently — one parent recalls agreeing to switch a weekend, the other doesn't recall agreeing to anything at all. Having a shared written reference generally heads off exactly that kind of disagreement, because both people can look at the same document instead of relying on memory.

A parenting plan can also be genuinely reassuring for a child, even indirectly. Kids tend to do better with predictability, and when parents have already worked through the schedule, the holidays, and how decisions get made, there's usually less last-minute renegotiating happening in front of the child — or worse, through the child. None of this means a plan needs to be long or formal to be worthwhile; even a short, clear document that both parents keep a copy of can do a lot of that work.

Where a plan becomes more clearly worth the effort is when there's already some friction between parents, when one or both parents want more certainty going forward, or when a plan needs to be relied on for something more formal — like being incorporated into a separation agreement or shown to a school. In those situations, a written plan generally moves from "nice to have" toward something genuinely useful.

What a Parenting Plan Might Typically Cover

There's no mandatory checklist, and no two families' plans look identical, but most parenting plans tend to circle around a similar handful of practical topics. Common ones include:

• The regular week-to-week (or two-week) schedule of where the child lives and spends time
• How holidays, school breaks, and special days like birthdays are shared or alternated
• How major decisions about the child — school, health care, religion — will generally be made
• How the parents will communicate with each other about the child, and how often
• How day-to-day information gets shared, like report cards, medical appointments, or a change in routine
• Pickup and drop-off logistics, including where exchanges happen and who's responsible for transportation
• A general process for handling disagreements or requesting changes down the road

Some parents also choose to address things like introducing a new partner to the child, how contact with extended family will work, or expectations around travel outside the province. How much detail to include is really a judgment call — some families prefer a fairly short plan that covers the essentials, while others find it worthwhile to spell out more, particularly where there's a history of miscommunication. Neither approach is "more correct"; what tends to matter most is whether the plan actually reflects what's realistic for your family.

The Regular Schedule and Holidays

For most families, the regular schedule is the section that gets the most attention, since it's the part that plays out every single week. It generally describes which days and overnights the child spends with each parent during an ordinary week, and there's no single arrangement that Ontario law prefers or presumes — what tends to work well depends heavily on the child's age and routine, each parent's work schedule, how close the two homes are to each other and to school, and, frankly, how well the parents are able to coordinate.

Holidays and special occasions usually get handled separately from the regular schedule, since they often don't fit neatly into a weekly pattern. Families commonly alternate specific holidays from year to year, split a longer school break down the middle, or fix certain traditions — a particular birthday celebration, say — regardless of whose regular time it would otherwise be. Being explicit that holiday arrangements override the regular schedule, and exactly when the switch happens, tends to prevent the kind of confusion that shows up around a long weekend.

Decision-Making and Communication

A parenting plan can also describe, in practical terms, how the parents intend to handle bigger decisions about the child — not just the legal question of who holds decision-making responsibility, but what that actually looks like in practice. For example, a plan might describe that both parents will discuss a potential change of school together before either commits, or that one parent generally takes the lead on medical appointments while keeping the other informed.

Communication provisions cover the more everyday side of things: how the parents will stay in touch about the child (by text, email, a shared calendar, or a co-parenting app), and roughly how quickly each parent tries to respond, especially if something is urgent. Some plans also touch on how the child will keep in contact with the other parent during scheduled time — a regular phone or video call, for instance — though this tends to work best when it's framed as something that supports the child's relationship with both parents, rather than as a way to check up on the other household.

How Parents Typically Approach Creating a Plan

There's no single required process for creating a parenting plan, and every family's path looks a little different. That said, many parents find it easier to work through a similar general sequence rather than trying to write a finished document in one sitting.

1. Start from the child's existing routine

   Note school or daycare hours, activities, bedtime, and each parent's existing involvement, before thinking about what feels fair between the two adults.

2. Sketch a rough weekly schedule

   A simple first draft of a regular pattern is usually enough to start — it doesn't need to be final, and most first attempts get refined once both parents react to it.

3. Work out holidays and special days separately

   Decide how these override the regular schedule, and be explicit about exactly when the switch happens to avoid confusion later.

4. Address decision-making and communication

   Talk through how major decisions will be made and how you'll keep each other informed day to day — see decision-making responsibility for the underlying legal concept.

5. Write it down

   Put the agreed points in a shared document both parents keep a copy of, even if it stays informal for now.

6. Review it together, and get help if you're stuck

   Where the two of you can't agree on a point, a family mediator can help structure the conversation; where you're ready to make the plan binding, independent legal advice is generally worth getting before signing.

Some parents work through these steps entirely on their own; others prefer a guided structure. Our Parenting-Plan Builder walks through these same general topics one at a time and organizes your answers into a first draft to take to the other parent, a mediator, or a lawyer.

If there's significant conflict or a safety concern, creating a plan together may not be appropriate. The steps above generally assume both parents can negotiate directly in reasonable safety. Where there's a serious power imbalance, a pattern of high conflict, or any concern about a child's safety, sitting down to work through a plan together may not be the right approach — and the right response depends heavily on the specific facts. See Urgent Help & Safety, and consider speaking with a qualified professional using the form below before proceeding.

How Disputes and Future Changes Are Generally Handled

Even a carefully thought-out parenting plan is unlikely to anticipate everything, and disagreements can still come up — about a one-off schedule swap, a proposed activity, or something bigger. Many parenting plans include a general description of how the parents intend to work through disagreements when they arise: talking it through directly first, for instance, and turning to a mediator if that doesn't resolve things. Having agreed on that process ahead of time, while things are calm, tends to make it easier to fall back on when a real disagreement actually comes up.

It's also worth planning, at least loosely, for the plan itself to change. A schedule built around a toddler's nap routine doesn't generally suit the same child once they're a teenager with their own activities and social life, and parents' own circumstances — a new job, a move, a change in work hours — shift over time too. Some parenting plans set a general expectation that the arrangement will be revisited periodically or at certain milestones; others are simply updated informally whenever something changes enough to warrant it. Either way, treating the plan as a living document, rather than something fixed in stone from day one, tends to keep it useful for longer.

Informal Plan, Separation Agreement, or Court Order?

One of the more important things to understand about a parenting plan is that it can exist at very different levels of formality, and the level that's right for your family may change over time. At the simplest end, a parenting plan can be nothing more than an informal, unsigned understanding between two parents — even a shared document or set of notes both people refer back to. This kind of plan can still be genuinely useful day to day, even though it generally isn't something a court would enforce directly on its own.

Many parents choose to formalize their plan further by folding it into a written separation agreement, generally reviewed and signed by both parents. Doing so tends to make the arrangement considerably easier to rely on — and, where necessary, to enforce — than an informal understanding on its own. For more on what that formal step involves, see our guide to parenting plans in Ontario, which covers the process of turning a plan into a signed agreement in more depth.

Where parents can't fully agree, or where one parent wants the added weight of a court order, a similar plan can often form the basis of a court order instead — either by consent, if both parents agree to its terms, or through a contested court process if they don't. None of these paths is inherently "better" than the others; what matters is generally how much certainty and enforceability your family's situation calls for, and how much both parents are able to agree on their own.

Getting Started

Whichever path you take through the steps above — on your own, with a mediator, or eventually with a lawyer's help — remember that a parenting plan is meant to serve your family's actual circumstances. It's worth revisiting and adjusting as those circumstances change, rather than treating the first version as the final word. For a deeper reference on what belongs in a plan and how it can be formalized, see our companion guide to parenting plans in Ontario.

Frequently Asked Questions